Nobody tried to steal our scaffold which was lucky; Greg had brought a knife.

If you’re in the neighbourhood and we’re about on site, stop by for a beer. It would be nice to rant to somebody about how shit the Council are.

Thanks to Matty J for the sweet camper.

My days are full of shovels and sunshine, silt and dust, blowing in my eyes and ears and crackling between my teeth. Here’s a picture of my shovel gang. We are called “Hells Mongrels”.

Tim had his gig in St Albans Park yesterday. Everyone agreed it was a roaring success and nobody needed to poop in a bag. The lineup included Tim, Marlon, parts of the Undercurrents, the Eastern, Devilish Mary, and the Renderers. Pretty good for a party thrown together in a couple of days.

Here is a picture of Tim and Mikey.

In breaking news, my house has been red stickered. This means nobody can go in at all and I am left wearing the same stinky pair of black jeans that I’ve worn for over a week. I imagine it’s similar to how the disaster has played out for local mid-career artist Tony de Lautour.

Here’s my first one.

17 minutes before the big quake struck, I took this photo of Rosie and Aine. We had just finished work and were heading home to fry the aforementioned halloumi. Look how carefree they are, sitting under all those bottles and faces in jars that would come tumbling down soon after. Then I told them I thought “the fartsack” was a funny name for bed and look at how they laughed.

Shortly after that the earthquake struck and we all cried, gone was the carefree moment of the fartsack joke. And do you know one of the strange thoughts that came into my head as the earth was moving and I was lurching toward a doorway? “Fuck, I wish I hadn’t given up smoking. If I’m gonna go like this, I could have been blissfully smoking a pack-a-day for the past six months.”

It’s funny how you never really know just how you will react in such a situation…

Last month’s Steve will be best remembered for his commentary on Tim’s favourite Clara Rockmore track, when he said, “The Theremin has the timbre of a cello but without any of the subtleties of its phrasing”. As the instrument moved into its upper range, he looked surprised and said “My, now it sounds like a female soprano with very good control of her vibrato.”

It is moments like this when I think to myself “This is exactly what people that hate this place imagine it to be like…”

September’s Steve is the Steve who plays in local bands Bits ‘n’ Pieces and the Dance Asthmatics (who have just put out 2 EP’s, one of  which you can download for free here).

Influential local record store owner Dave Imlay says “the thing about Bits ‘n’Pieces is that John thinks they’re a sixties band and Steve thinks they’re the Fall and somehow – in a fucked up way – they end up sounding like Pavement.”

Steve drinks at Goodbye Blue Monday less since “its not as good as it used to be” and these days can be found at Schroders in Shirley, where he tells me they have a piece of wood on which they have burned “Drinking Tomorrows Beer Today”. Steve and I have decided means “Being Alcoholics”.

Bits ‘n’ Pieces are playing here this Thursday night.

Here’s this month’s Steve with a bottle of Southern Comfort and a lime…

When I used to run a bar in Luton with my sister Anna, it was Steve Dillon who once drunk 32 pints of Guinness on St Patrick’s Day, concluding at 4am on March 18 with his swinging a bar stool around above his head and shouting “Alright, I’ma cunt I’ll admitit…”

The point is: Good pubs tend to have a Steve. This has led to me starting Goodbye Blue Monday’s Steve of the Month Award.

The inaugural winner is Steve Tyerman who plays fiddle and drinks cask wine. Steves interests include discussing whether Ulysses is readable, drinking cask wine and stating “Laurie Anderson is so American  that she’s part of the problem“. Steve plays in excellent local covers bands the Hicks and the Black Velvet Band and drinks cask wine.

Congratulations Steve – you’re Steve of the Month.

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