I hope you all get excited by toilet news as much as I do… The walls are now patched, the paint has been reapplied over the graffiti and anti graffiti coating applied over the paint. The door that was kicked in by the skank has been replaced and we believe they are a pretty pleasant environment as far as pub toilets go.

Look at the nice new glass on the Tony de Lautoiletdoor…

We really endeavored to provide nice toilets but the retard kids insisted on trashing them. So, we waited until they all headed off to the newest bar ’til we fixed ‘em up. Tell us if you see some spotty-arse kid kicking a hole in the wall for a laugh.

This leads me to another observation. When we opened the place was full of good people, all joyously happy to have a venue that was a respite from the usual Christchurch bullshit. Then, as always happens, the moron brigade showed up and the place was jam-packed, line outside, glasses being smashed, toilets trashed, vomit, sex on the toilet floor etc. These kids then scared off our good customers and it took us a good six months of behaving like Nazis to be rid of them. We are now in the phase of getting the good people back.

We know this because we have commissioned a detailed report from Statistics New Zealand and they have provided us with the a raft of statistical analysis of our business. Looking through them, I noticed a correlation between two which I have included below.